The Amazing ShamWow

okay, so the name is terrible, and the guy selling them has on a stupid microphone depsite the fact that he isn't peaking to a stadium of people, but the ShamWow towels look pretty cool. Yeah, I know, they're supposed to look great, it's a commercial. But you can only fake so much absorption, right? When he soaks up all that soda from the swatch of carpet without any pressure or even much time, I must admit I really wanted a ShamWow. The only thing that really suprises me about this commercial is the fact that the OxyClean guy isn't involved (probably explains the bad name). That guy sells the greatest products. His latest commercials are for Mighty Putty and I want some of that too - he shows it fixing all sorts of things and holding shelves and even being strong enough to tow a truck! Fortunately I don't buy things off TV (probably the only medium I won't shop in, right honey?). And I guess I don't really have any need for Mighty Putty. But I still want a ShamWow.

author's note: this entry might be slightly random and rambling - don't blame me, I'm hopped up on cold medicine.

Stardust

My husband and I watched Stardust last night and I really enjoyed it. It didn't get very good reviews, but I can't say that I understand why - I thought it was good. It is sort of in the same vein as The Princess Bride - a fun, fanciful fantasy for the whole family (wheeeeeeee, alliteration). The characters were all charming and entertaining and I thought the story was delightful. I highly recommend it and hope you feel the same.

More Rabbits Please

It hasn't been on for a while, but I really liked the commercial for Volkswagon Rabbit that played up the reproductive aspects of actual rabbits. It started with a few of the cars driving aorund, and quickly the numbers increased until the streets were full of them. I especially liked that some had different colored doors or hoods like they were mixed breed between black and white cars. Clever and funny. We need more ads like that.

The Incredibles

I have seen the Incredibles several times in the past week and I have been reminded just how good it is. There are not many movies that bear up to multiple veiwings in a short span of time without becoming tiresome, but this is one. My husband remarked that it was about time they make a sequel and I agree - bring on The Incredibles 2!!

author's note: I have been sick for a week and I am in no mood to be witty or long winded - hence this short and fairly dull entry.

Prevention is the Best Medicine

I saw a commercial a few weeks back for Humana Gold Plus health insurance. This particular plan is a Medicare supplement, meaning that it covers whatever Medicare doesn't and is therefore only for seniors. What I thought was great however, was that this plan comes with a gym membership in many areas. Obviously Humana believes that it is worth a little expense to keep patients healthy and fit so that in the end they will end up needng less medical care. This is unusual thinking for an insurance company in my mind, and even more so for a Medicare supplement plan since Medicare itself doesn't share these views. In fact, Medicare will not pay for any annual check ups for its members,other than the initial evaluation needed within the first 6 months of obtaining Medicare. If more insurance companies took the view that an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure, maybe the healthcare situation in this country wouln't be so dire. (Of course there are many other issues that need fixing as well, but taking a focus on getting healthier seems like a good place to start)

The Polar Express

I just turned on the Polar Express thinking that it would be good for the kids and not so boring since I have never seen it before. Well, it has been on for about 20 minutes and I am in the other room on the computer so that should tell you something. I watched for about ten minutes until the whiny kid whose voice is clearly that of a 40 something New York mensch came on and then I was done. Icky computer animation is annoying enough without terrible characters too. Not my new Christmas favorite.

Gingerbread never sounded so gross

There is a new commercial for Shrek 3 on HD DVD that I find very disturbing. In it "Gingy" the gingerbread man character from the Shrek movies is calling some executives to complain about the new HD DVD veresion of Shrek 3. He says that the Hi Def picture makes him look too good and he wants to take a nibble. Gross. Then we hear a crunch followed by "Ow", and another crunch followed by "Ow, yummy." Gross and creepy. At least the executives have the decency to look a little sickened by the whole idea of a cookie man eating himself, but over all the whole commercial is in bad taste. Pun intended.

The Assassination of Jesse James

There is a new movie out called The Assassination of Jesse James By the Coward Robert Ford. I believe it has been in theaters for a week. You may not have heard about it because there aren't any previews or advertisements for this movie. You may think that is because it is a small independent film that has no budget for such things, but let me assure you that is not the case. This movie stars Brad Pitt. I cannot believe that there wouldn't be any previews or anything for a movie starring one of the most famous movie stars currently working. Maybe the movie sucks, or maybe they figured the title was just too long and would take up all the time needed for a preview. Either way it is weird.

We Don't Want Your Stinking Opinion

There is a radio stataion in my area called JackFM that I think has made a grave error in marketing strategy. Their slogan is "we play what we want" and I happen to find this very offensive. I realize the meaning behind this is that they have more variety than a station who sticks with a typical playlist because they will play any song they feel like whenever they feel like it, but basing an entire station around the whole 'no requests ever' premise seems to me like a big F you to the listener. Every time I hear their ads saying "we play what we want" I hear a silent 'regardless of what you want to hear' on the end of that sentence, and it makes me not want to listen to their station. They may call it Jack, but I call it bull.

I Am Legend

I went to see I Am Legend expecting a fun diversion for a couple of hours with maybe a few decent thrills thrown in. I was totally unprepared for the way it affected me. This is not the most fabulous movie ever, even though it is good, but it really struck a cord with me for some reason. It is probably just lingering pregnancy hormons, but I found myself unable to shake the feeling of disconnection the movie left me with. I have been a fan of Will Smith for a very long time and I think he was absolutely incredible in this movie. He does an amazing job of portraying not only the lonliness of his situation, but also very subtly expressing a tightly wrapped desperation and increasing loss of sanity as well. The range of emotions he manages to reveal while keeping his face a mask of tightly held self control when faced with the loss of his best friend and only companion is something to see. I'm sure most people will not be affected by this movie the way I was, but I would still recommend it to anyone looking for a fun diversion for a few hours as well as some of Will Smith's best work.

Hooray for Puppies!

There is currently a commercial that I am finding hard to dislike even though it is incredibly stupid. It is a holiday themed commercial and a puppy is welcoming his puppy family into his home for Christmas. He calls them all Bro, Sis and Cuz, which I find terribly annoying, and there is no mention of the product until the very end when you see that it is an ad for Cottonelle toilet paper. Overall it is dumb and irritating, but I just can't resist it - there aren't many things cuter than labrador puppies. So while it is totally ineffective because I will not be switching to Cottonelle any time soon, I still look forward to it coming on so I can see the cute little dogs - I just have to mute that whole Cuz business.

Match the Music to the Message

Awesome

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WMQt7ARAqXs

Some People Don't Want Cat Hair on Everything?

I like the new commercial for the Bissell Pet Hair Eraser where the couple has covered everything in their house, including themselves with plastic wrap. They are sitting there crinkling and rustling, and I'm sure that everyone out there watching who has pets can sympathize. Personally, I gave up a long time ago on keeping pet hair off of my clothes. I used to lint roll and try not to touch anything right before I left the house if I was wearing black and it was such a hassle. Finally, ony day I just said " you know what? I have cats. I'm going to to have cat hair on me and that's just the way it is." I feel so much freer now. Of course, I also never went anywhere nice so it didn't matter, and now I don't go anywhere at all so it matters even less. Which is probably good because who knows what is all over me now between the cats and two kids. As for the rest of my house, well, cleanliness is next to godliness so I guess me and God aren't that close. Fortunately one of my cats has taken to chasing his tail in the bathtub every night leaving copious amounts of hair (and I do mean copious- we're talking double handfuls every night!!). I say fortunately because it is easy to sweep out of the tub and it cuts down on his shedding everywhere else. Unfortunately it is hard to get every single hair so taking a bath might leave you a little fuzzy. That's just the way it is.

Statistical Sensationalism part II

One of my favorite blogs (although I don't understand half of the subject matter) had a post yesterday about statistics and their persuasive abilities. I have been thinking about this topic as well recently because of two instances where I have heard misleading information on television. The first was on an episode of Law and Order SVU where a victim had been subjected to genital mutilation as is common many places in Africa and other developing areas. The medical examiner on the show said that even though it is illegal in this country, some immigrants and aliens still perform the act, and "some 200,000 girls could be at risk." Now I have a problem with this statement. While it is most likely true, the way it was stated made light of the very important "could be" so that it sounded more like 'will be.' The result of this is that viewers might be shocked into believing that 200,000 girls would be subjected to this horrible procedure. The second error is that there is no time frame for when they would be potentially at risk - this year? The next ten years? This lack of reference to a time period makes it even more misleading and sensationalizes something that most likely is not very widespread in this country at all. The second statistic that bothers me is in a series of ads for autism (strangely enough it is narrated by Mariska Hargitay, one of the stars of SVU). In the commercial a typicall family situation will be shown - leaving instructions for a babysitter or teaching a kid to throw a ball, and there will be an opening statistic offered such as the odds of the babysitter needing to call 911 or the kids growing up to be a professional ball player. Invariably the odds are very slim that the normal seeming situation will happen. Then she tells us that the odds of a child being diagnosed with autism are 1 in 150 - much more likely - so we should help the foundatin or test our kids or whatever it is the commercial wants us to do (I usually am so ticked by the statistic that I don't listen to the end). So, does anyone see the problem here? I'll give you a minute to think about it. No? Well here's a hint - the key word is "diagnosed." That's right folks, that scary statistic isn't about the likelihood of your kid actually HAVING autism, just that he might be DIAGNOSED with it by some hack who probably graduated at the bottom of their class in medical school and can't tell the difference between Ausperger's syndrome and a video game induced stupor. Now, I could get started on the topic of the over diagnoses of kids today (what's the chance you will be told your kid has ADD - 1 in 3?), but that is a topic for another day. As for this, I'm going to look into the odds that a child mught actually have autism, and keep on throwing the ball to my kids.

In Sync

I like the new commercials for Sync - a new product that allow you to run your music and other devices in your car by voice command. My favorite is the one where people have gotten so used to having Sync that they try to apply voice control to other items - resulting in some fnuny incidents. The best are the guy running into a treadmill that has not started, and the girl crashing into a door that didn't open. They look so confused as to what went wrong. I don't particularly see the need for this product - especially since in one commercial it shows a guy pushing a button before speaking his voice command and I figure if you have to push a button to make it work, how is that really different from now? So I doubt I will be purchasing this product anytime soon, if ever, but I will keep on enjoying the ads - tv on!

This Commercial Has to Go

Yet another infuriating pharmacuetical commercial - this time for Detrol LA. In it a woman is sneaking to the bathroom so everyone won't know just how often she has to go. Stupid. Once she gets to the bathroom, the 'girl' symbol on the door hops off and enters with her to talk about Detrol LA. Even stupider. The woman then begins to take medical advice from a 2 dimensional cartoon drawing that moments ago was on the front off a door and is now sitting on a couch with her. So beyond stupid I don't have a word for it. The fact that the symbol gets life size when she gets down off the door and is small again when she gets back up - probably the least of this commercials problems but irritating nonetheless. I cannot even begin to express how idiotic this ad is - even writing this now I am almost dumbstruck (it's so bad its stupidity has spread!) by the fact someone would agree to film and broadcast this swill. If I'm visiting the restroom so often the sign begins to talk to me, either I have had way to much at the bar, or I will take its advice to see a doctor - only about my apparent hallucinations rather then my bladder. This commercial is so bad I feel it necessary to endorse a competing drug - for bladder issues ask your doctor about Enablex: I don't know if it works, but the perky little ballons in its commercials are way less annoying.

Super Sonic

I just love the commercials for Sonic where various people are sitting in their cars and having random conversations that sometimes relate to the food and sometimes don't. One of my favorites is the one with the two girls where one asks the other if she still eats a bowl of cookie dough after a bad date and her answer is that she is too old for that so she only eats half a bowl, or sometimes two. Her expression when her friend points out that two half bowls is a whole bowl is great. As a group the spots featuring the married couple are probably the best - the wife's delivery is fabulous. These commercials all feature members of Second City in Chicago, so they are probably improvised as well, which makes them even better in my mind. By the way, I've only been to Sonic once, but if you get a chance to go definitely order the cookie dough blast shake - awesome!!

Sounds of the Season

A Denver radio station has been advertising that from now until the New Year they will be playing only seasonal music, and I have to say this is a great marketing strategy if you are looking to have people boycott your station. Seriuosly, who wants to listen to Christmas music for 2 months straight? Not me! And before you label me a grinch, let me assure you that I enjoy the classic Christmas carols: Little Drummer Boy, Carol Of The Bells, Deck The Halls, etc. However, there are only so many variations of these that are tolerable - I am reminded of a CD we had at my last job that featured a version of O'Tannenbaum, sung by very operatic voices who not only weren't following the standard tune, they didn't even seem to be singing related notes. I actually only know what song it is supposed to be because I looked at the liner notes. Absolutely unbearable. My daughter plays better music with her plastic piano, which only has four keys and she plays with her fists. Of course, if you stick to the classics only, it is bound to get more than a little repetitive, which of course is why people are continually trying to write new Christmas songs. I can pretty much say that as a group these all blow. With the exception of Santa Baby and All I Need For Christmas Is You, there are no good modern Christmas songs* - and I think that's fine. I want to hear and sing the carols I grew up listening to - the classics are classics because they are good. There is absolutely no need for any new Christmas songs, except to fill the hours and hours of air time needed by idiot radio statoins that want to drive everyone crazy by playing nothing else.

*I would like to add Jingle Bell Rock and Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer to my list of acceptable modern Christmas songs.

Pony Rides for Everyone

You've got to love the new Verizon commercial where one girl gets a pony but is jealous of her friends' new Verizon cell phones. They are all staring at the pony with such disbelief, as it snarls and destroys a dog house - hilarious. It is such a great play on the fact that every little girl supposedly asks for a pony at some point, and the choice to make this one apparently rabid is great. "Does he bite?""yeah." So funny.
In other pony news, the Toyota commercial where the mother is talking on the phone about how much she saved on her new toyota (model?) and asks that her daughter not be told because she wants a pony is sort of funny too. Not so much the whole commercial itself which is actually kind of stupid, but definitely the little girl all dressed up in her horrible pink cowgirl outfit looking like she is about to launch herself at her mother in fury. Her expression is great, although of course telling your 6 year old she can't have a pony shouldn't be this big of a deal. But that kid is scary so maybe that explains it.

We Don't Need Your Charity

'Tis the season to be give, and also for countless commercials begging your donations and generosity for others. I firmly believe in helping out the less fortunate in any way possible, but some of these so called charities have gotten me a little peeved. I hear all kinds of commercials asking for donations of new toys or clothes or whatever, and to me this seems very greedy and more than a little tacky. I realize the desire to have new things, but come on people - this is charity. It might seem a little harsh, but in my opinion people in the position to need charity should be happy to have whatever they get - beggars can't be choosers as the saying goes. Now, this doesn't mean that they should get worn out or ruined things, but there are plenty of barel used toys and clothes out there that have a lot of life left in them and could use a new home and someone to love them. Forcing people to buy brand new items for donation is just feeding our already over-consuming culture and creating more and more garbage and cast off items. I hate throwing things out, and I end up filling my house because there are practically no places to donate things to anymore - earlier this year I tried to give some practically brand new window blinds to a thrift store and they wouldn't take them because they were used. Um, hello - thrift store! I will happily donate brand new food items (obviously an area where used isn't feasible), but beyond that I will only patronize charities like the Salvation Army or Goodwill whose goal is to minimize waste as well has helping the needy.
some charities who will take donations of used items:
The Salvation Army
Goodwill Industries
Vietnam Veterans of America
Soles4souls

Absolute-ly love it

The commercial where the fat guy jumps into the pool, swims its length, and emerges a perfectly toned model? Awesome. A creative twist on two of societies biggest issues: obesity and beer goggles.

Aquadots

Several weeks ago there was a recall for a toy called Aquadots. Apparently, when the small beads that make up this toy are ingested they turn into GHB - better known as the date rape drug. That's something isn't it? You give your kids something new to play with and suddenly they are zombies lying on the floor (I do have to admit though that this is sort of appealing in terms of long car rides - assuming of course you could manage it without an actual coma and risk of seizure). Now, a recall is absolutely necessary in this case, but I can't help thinking that any toy with tiny little beads should only be played with by kids who have outgrown the urge to put things in their mouths anyway. In fact, the packaging is labeled 4+ years, and of course the first case of a child being harmed after ingesting the beads was a 20 month old. I have a 20 month old and I would never knowingly let her play with any type of little beads, toxic or not, because she will undoubtedly put them in her mouth and I wouldn't want her to choke. So while I think whoever was watching that poor child was being somewhat negligent by letting them play with a toy that is inappropriate (here Tommy, play with this choking hazard), I guess I also have to thank them for bringing the toxicity of this toy to light. Hopefully their child recovers and no more children are harmed.

Amendment:
I wanted to add that I wonder how many creepy perverts out there heard about the recall and rushed out to get their hands on some free GHB for their personal use. I hope none, but you never know.