3 pm slump

Robert Goulet has passed away, and now office workers everywhere can rest assured that he won't be coming to mess with their desks if they get drowsy in the afternoon without eating their Emerald Nuts.

Asleep at the wheel

I have noticed another delightful warning mentioned on Lunesta commercials. They suggest that you call your doctor if you walk, eat or DRIVE while sleeping. Awesome - so this sleeping pill really only makes you unconcious while your body goes around doing other stuff like driving to the store and cramming cake in your face. I enough trouble not eating when I am awake, I certainly dont want to have to worry about doing it in my sleep too. And driving is dangerous enough with just the drunks and idiots out there, but now we have to watch out for sleep-drivers? Nothing like waking up after a good night's Lunesta induced coma to find out you've driven across state lines and gained twenty pounds.

30 Days of Night

My husband and I got a rare night out this weekend and we went to see 30 Days of Night, and I guess I was pleasantly surprised. I didn't expect much, and this certainly isn't in the running for greatest movie ever, but it wasn't horrible. The gore was less than I expected - mostly just blood on the snow and vampires faces and long shots of people being eaten. There was one very gruesome shot that was included towards the end and actually felt uneccesary. I figure it was added to compete with the Saw franchise. Personally, I feel they could have edited the movie only a little differently and have created more suspense and an overall scarier movie, but it was okay the way it was. There were of course the usual characters who act stupidly, but the ending was unexpected, at least to me. I don't know if I recommend it, but if you want to see a scary movie that isn't torture porn, this is an okay option.

Gentleman Author

As a fan of fantasy fiction (R.I.P. Robert Jordan) I am always interested in new authors and new series that I can get into so the waiting for new books in series I already follow doesn't seem so long. I have recently discovered the writing of Scott Lynch and think he deserves a mention here. He has written two books so far and both are excellent adventures with very creative concepts and charming characters. The first book, The Lies of Locke Lamora , introduces the main characters who are a group of con men theives who call themselves the Gentlemen Bastards. That name alone is what inspired me to read this book, and the excellent writing is what compelled me to race through it in two days despite having kids to take care of. The second book, Red Seas Under Red Skies continues the saga and leaves room for more books to follow. I wish Scott all the best creativity and speed in completing the next book in the series - I eagerly await reading it.

Inexplicable, Incomprehensible, Inexcusable

there are no shortage of stupid or offensive commercials out there, but here are three I think fall in the categories of inexplicable, incomprehensible or inexcusable

I have just seen a new commercial for Herbal Essences shampoo that features a girl riding a camel through the desert (the camel is wearing sneakers for some reason), and she comes across an oasis, where a man riding a giant seahorse pops up and hands her a bottle of shampoo. Seriously bizarre - can you picture the pitch meeting for this? Oh, it's going to be in the desert with a camel and a seahorse? Fabulous! Nothing sells more shampoo than camels and seahorses!


Secondly, what is with the Levi’s commercial (view here) where the guy pulls up his pants and the phone booth comes shooting up through the floor? I can’t even think of what they could possibly be trying to say with that – put your pants on and find yourself out on the street? Not a selling point in my opinion. What if you don’t have your wallet? Or your keys? Basically just a stupid commercial that has nothing to do with selling pants. The effects are neat, but if you want to sell jeans you need shots of attractive people with cute butts, not special effects. (There have been many blogs about this commercial both pro and con, but most seem to be discussing the fact that there are straight and gay versions of the ad. Whoopdeedo, it's still stupid either way.)


My current least favorite commercial uses the popular medium of television to spread the word on the dangers of meningococcal meningitis. According to the commercial our teenagers are drastically at risk for catching this disease from kissing, sharing sodas and even being in close contact. Now, this is a serious disease and I don't have a problem with giving it some attention. My problem comes from the tone the commerical takes, which is that the disease is lurking around every corner and you should be constantly vigilant against infection. Maybe we should all stay locked in our homes so we don't ever catch anything from anyone. I mean, maybe I should consider homeschooling my children when they are the right age so they don't associate with all of these teenagers running around infected with meningitis. By the way, the small type in the commercial says that only 21 in 100,000 adolescents actually contract meningitis each year.

Do It Yourself

I like the current campaign advocating healthy living that features people finding discarded love handles and thunder thighs lying about after people have lost them (http://www.adcouncil.org/default.aspx?id=54). However one particular commercial in this series bugs me: a couple in a grocery store find a double chin lying on the floor. After picking it up and studying it for a minute, they put it back on the floor and walk away complaining “someone’s going to trip on that.” Well, you just picked it up, why don’t you move it lazy? I hate the current attitude shared by so many people that it isn’t their responsibility to fix anything. They just walk around complaining that someone should fix the problem, but never bother to do anything themselves. There was actually a commercial some time back that addressed this issue. It featured a bunch of girls in a dorm bathroom staring at a running faucet. They were all commenting on what a waste it was and how something should be done when another girl walked up and turned the faucet off. Everyone else was dumbstruck. I thought this was an effective way to get the point across that if you see something that needs fixing there is no better time and no better person to fix it than you. Complaining never solves the problem. Too bad the couple in the grocery store missed it

Possible Side Effects

I love all of the drug commercials statements of possible side effects – especially ones that include coma or death which to me aren’t really side effects but more like permanent failures of the medicine. Side effects I can live with, they might make life a little less pleasant but they are tolerable – death not so much. I also like that the sleep aid Lunesta lists drowsiness as a side effect. Isn’t that the main effect? Don’t you expect a sleeping pill to make you drowsy? I also enjoy the side effects for all the drugs marketed for restless leg syndrome. Along with all the usual suspects they include increased gambling or sexual urges. So you can sit still finally, but you’re going to do it at a poker table where you’ll risk losing your 401k. Awesome. Personally I think people with restless leg syndrome just need to stop drinking triple shot espressos all day, but no one is lining up to give me a medical degree so what do I know.

Animating Science

I like how advertising companies try to fool the idiots watching by animating their commercials and trying to pass it off as a valid example of how their product works. A commerical for Scrubbing Bubbles: “Watch the science as the scrubbing bubbles clean away deep stains in minutes.” This of course is accompanied by animated scrubby bubbly brushes flying around a bathroom cleaning sinks and toilets. Cute, yes, science, no. My vote would be to keep the flying animated mascots and lose the voice over claim to science. Or else actually make your product clean the bathroom alone; that I would buy.
For that matter, it seems like any commercial for pain medication has a similar issue. Watch how fast the pain is relieved in our little drawing! Sorry, but how fast you can make little wavy red lines disappear from a cartoon’s head, back, stomach, etc is in now way related to how fast the actual medicine works.
I do however, enjoy the Nasonex bumble bee. He in no way makes me want to try the medicine, which I don't need anyway, but I like his accent and find the incongruity of a bee selling allergy medication amusing. People who are allergic to bees don’t get runny noses and watery eyes very often – shouldn’t he be selling epi pens?

Faith in Medicine

I noticed recently on a commercial for a new drug Veramyst (don’t remember what it is for –asthma maybe?) that in small letters at the bottom of the screen it says “the way Veramyst works is not totally understood.” Excuse me? First of all, how does a drug get FDA approval if we don’t know how it works? Secondly, do they really expect people to take a medicine that isn’t fully understood by their doctor? Not that any doctor is going to admit that of course, but geez. Might as well just call it magic or the will of God. Hey there’s an idea – market it solely to Christians and say it works through Jesus’ love.

I Win?

While I enjoy the images involved (especially the somewhat chubby people riding horses), the current EBay campaign – shop victoriously – has me asking why we are so excited by paying the most. Doesn’t that just make us the biggest sucker? As an avid ebayer myself I understand the compulsion to win an auction – it is so easy to get drawn in to the bidding that you almost impulsively keep raising your price in hopes of winning. For most people this is probably more satisfying than actually purchasing the item in question. And the sense of loss when something slips away can be just as strong. I have found myself searching for new auctions of similar items after bidding on something I never actually planned on buying has ended – especially if the price was really low. Which is the appeal of EBay – that you can get great stuff for a good price. Of course, this doesn’t explain why there are so many auctions out there with people buying items for higher prices than retail. Are those people just stupid, or have they gotten caught in the thrall of “shopping victoriously?”

intro

Okay – I’ll be the first to admit it, I watch way too much television. I could give lots of excuses: I have two kids, (19 months and 1 month) and while I love playing with them, holding hands while my daughter jumps on the couch is a lot less boring when I can watch Project Runway also. Or how about: I absolutely love reading but it’s pretty hard when you are feeding one baby while simultaneously trying to chase the other around the dining room table. Another good one: I’d love to go to the park everyday but its cold and snowy out there (this one doesn’t work as well in July). But the honest truth is I am solidly addicted to the television. From 8am Buffy reruns to the 10 pm version of Law and Order, I pretty much have the idiot box on all day. Which means that I get a chance to see a lot of commercials, a lot of times. And I can’t help wondering why people get paid for some of this crap. I mean obviously most commercials are stupid are annoying or boring or just plain forgettable. And some are truly inspired and funny and I actually enjoy watching them over and over again. The current careerbuilder.com campaign where office workers are surviving in the jungle: brilliant. The ones I will probably comment most on are the ones that fall just shy of the mark – they have smart or clever premises, but their execution is lacking. Unfortunately it is all too indicative of most people’s current attitudes towards their work, and it is a shame that whoever created the initial idea wasn’t committed enough to see it through to completion accurately.

The prime example of this is a commercial that ran several years back for the Nissan Sentra (www.NissanUSA.com/Sentra). This ad featured two crash test dummies fighting over getting into the car with the tagline “everybody wants to drive it.” Clever, it caught your attention, there was only one glaring problem. The dummies were fighting over the passenger side door. Maybe the crash test dummies were British, maybe it was a sly allusion to the fact that they just can’t afford the premiums on their insurance anymore after the number of wrecks they typically get into so they had to be passengers. What it said to me was “no one wants to drive it.” Whoops – probably not the message intended. But I bet it was awesome in England.